Dreaming With the Top Off
Dreaming With the Top Off
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A few months ago, I felt nudged by God to give my husband carte blanche to dream without boundaries. For the past few years he has been growing more and more weary at his work, more and more concerned about the financial viability of our family, and he’s looking at the next handful of years in our children’s lives and wondering if there is something different we can do to help prepare them for their futures. He’s mentioned changing careers and/or geographical locations a number of times.
So one day when he was, once again, expressing his frustrations, his fatigue, and his concerns about the future of our family, I knew in my soul that I needed to say it: I needed to clearly give him permission to dream with the top off.
I reminded him that I am with him and I am for him and I will go wherever we need to go if it means we are doing what is best for our entire family. I told him I thought it would be a good idea for us to seek counseling through this process so that we move forward in as healthy and healed a way as possible. And I reminded him that his own peace of mind and sanity and the gut feelings he is experiencing matter and that I want to hear what he has to say. I reassured him that I genuinely want to hear his hopes, his fears, and even his audacious, “surely these could never really happen” dreams.
So that’s what we are doing these days. We are in full-fledged Dream Mode over here. I am collecting methods, tools, and questions we can ask ourselves to help us unlock the dreams inside; we’ve started seeing a counselor to help us navigate this season; we are each doing massive research regarding what some of the different possibilities would entail finance-wise and relationship-wise; we are in deep soul-search mode, processing this with friends, and praying a ton. And one thing I’m especially excited about is this: the Hubs and I will be going away this coming weekend to spend time together to really dig deep and hopefully find some more specific direction for our family.
We’re looking at all kinds of crazy ideas, you guys. We’ve already explored a few that we ended up tossing out the window because we realized we didn’t want to go that road. We’re scouting out land in a few different places, talking with friends who are smart, refreshing our resumes, and gathering up our financial documents to submit to a professional for review. And we’ve invited our kids along for the journey so that they, too, have a voice in the process.
It’s messy. It’s insightful. It’s hard. But I’m shocked to discover that it’s actually kind of fun, too. Our conversations have been more lively than they have in recent past. And we’re having a great time letting each other say off-the-wall ideas, pick them apart, and then choose to either keep them as options or throw them away.
It is fascinating, energizing, and addicting. But, that being said, I will be glad when we can actually land on something worth aiming towards as well. Because, as fun as it may be, it is also not sustainable for us to keep going like this forever. The sense of uncertainty is uncomfortable; we need clarity in order to move forward with purpose and vigor.
As it says in the KJV of Proverbs 29:18,
or, as it is translated in the NIV:
We’re on a hunt for vision, y’all. Enough of this unrestrained, haphazard, focus-less living we’ve been doing for the past bit of time!
Let’s do this.
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What about you?
How do you find vision for your life? Do you have a particular method or set of questions you visit? What has been your experience in the dreaming process?
Please share your journey in the comment section below.